Broken
by Rhiane Raine
Summary: Harry and Ginny suffer through seperation anxiety shortly after they form a close bond with each other.


**Disclaimer: The Harry Potter universe belongs to J.K. Rowling. **

**Broken**

**Harry's POV**

Harry Potter closed his eyes in mental anguish as he lay back on his bed in Privet Drive, number four. He had just been returned to his prison after a short escape. According to the Headmaster of Hogwarts, Harry had not been "home" long enough for the blood magic to be reinforced for the upcoming year but he had allowed Harry a two-week stay at Headquarters.

Being back in his Aunt and Uncle's house after having been around the Weasley's, Hermione, and the Order for a fortnight was more torture than he's prepared for. Of course, when he and Dumbledore set up the arrangement, he hadn't known that he and Ginny would become very close during his brief stay.

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It happened one night when he couldn't sleep due to the haunting nightmares of his Godfather's recent death. He hadn't wanted to disturb Ron so he had gone to the sitting room and sat on the couch, staring into the dying flames. There had been a shuffling noise behind him. He turned to where it had came from and there was Ginny wearing a silky white nightdress with her red hair tousled from sleep. Harry had been about to inquire what was keeping her up when it happened. Ginny smiled at him. Nice and slow, her beautiful crimson lips curved into a loving smile that took Harry's breath away. No words we spoken.

He sat there watching her smile at him, mesmerized. He had no idea what she was smiling about but he couldn't help but smile back. Soon they were both laughing gently on the couch together.

A brilliant lock of long red hair had fallen across her face as she shook with silent laughter. Harry remembered thinking she looked amazing like that, her hair falling in her eyes, but he decided it must be annoying for her to have in her way.

He reached up and brushed it aside for her, a serious look on his face. Ginny's laughing stopped as she looked up at him with the same expression.

A new emotion was coursing through his veins. He felt as if he'd do anything for this girl. He wanted to hold her, protect her...kiss her. He was very quick to accept his feelings as Ginny placed a hand on the back of his neck, rubbing circles at the nape of his neck with her thumb to soothe his nerves.

Harry leaned in, his face coming closer to hers. She made no motion to back out. In fact, he could remember her helping him reach her lips by applying pressure ever so slightly with the hand on his neck.

He brushed his lips against her and was instantly lost in the soft caress. It was like silk touching his skin, the moonlight illuminating his face...

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There on his bedside table in Privet Drive was a picture of Ginny, sitting in the Gryffindor common room relaxed and happy. Every time Harry glanced at it, Ginny's face lit up and her smile dominated his thoughts. He'd had this photograph for a while now. Collin Creevey had given him copies of all the pictures he took at Hogwarts as a gift once a few years back.

Harry wished so badly that he could be there with her now. This war had already started taking its toll on the world, namely anyone close to him. The day he had to return to his Hell Hole (as and Ginny privately nicknamed it) they had been informed that Bill was injured during a mission for the Order. Seeing as it wasn't safe just then, they weren't allowed to visit him in St. Mungo's. The last word he'd heard was that Bill was expected to recover. To Harry it meant that there were several things that could go wrong but they were hoping none of them would happen and were being optimistic about the situation.

Harry had tried his hardest to comfort Ginny; Bill was the closest to her out of all six of the Weasley boys. She was upset that she couldn't go to him, but was able to keep her emotions in check while Harry was there. He wasn't stupid; he knew she wanted to break down and cry but she wouldn't for Harry. She knew the more upset she was, the guiltier it would make him feel.

He'd had a vision the night it happened but, due to the lack of sleep he'd been suffering, the twins had nicked him some dreamless sleep potion from Snape's bag. How they accomplished that feat, Harry didn't want to know but he knew that it must have very difficult.

Ginny encouraged him to take the potion and sleep, that he "needed sleep badly". The pleading voice she used told him he must have needed it because he gave in to her. Now he bitterly wished he hadn't.

Fred, George, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny all told him that it wasn't his fault that he didn't know the dreamless sleep potion would allow Voldemort visions through. The part that was bothering him was when he couldn't wake up. The last thing he remembered during the vision was thinking that he should tell someone about Bill. Then the vision faded and he must have fallen back into his _desperately needed_ dreamless sleep because when he woke up it was to Ron shaking him, saying it was breakfast time. He had run to the kitchen and informed the Order members present immediately, hoping it wasn't too late.

He tried to put his own pain aside in order to ease Ginny's but she was being decidedly stubborn about it. Every time he tried to say something to make he feel better, she came up with two or three more reasons as to why it was not his fault. If it weren't for the fact that he was more concerned about Ginny's state of being, he would have been annoyed at how she held onto her pain, locked inside a steel vault, rather than handing it over to himself.

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He missed her. It became a routine, that first week of his "vacation". He would attempt to sleep before stealing downstairs. Eventually Ginny would rouse and join him. They talked all night long until Ginny fell asleep in his arms. Harry would lay as still as he could on the sitting room couch with Ginny's pretty face resting in the crook of his neck. Only when the sky was streaked with pink would Harry pick her up and carry her back to her and Hermione's room to sleep a few more hours.

It just wasn't the same, without Ginny's petite form leaning against his own. His arms felt strange, stiff at his side. He imagined she missed him holding her, but hoped for the whole world that he was wrong. It was bad enough that he was going crazy without her let alone her missing him just as severely.

Harry rolled over on his bed expecting to hear Ginny laugh as he was "trying to stay conscious to be with her rather than sleep" as she put it. No giggles or leather couch cushion rustlings were heard. The only sound emitted was the squeak of his worn out mattress springs.

**Ginny's POV**

Ginny Weasley lay in her and Hermione's room trying to sleep. For the past week or so she had out herself to sleep dreaming of going back downstairs in a few hours time only fall asleep in Harry's arms. It had only been a day and she missed him as bad as the grass misses the rain.

It was about five hours after Harry had been returned to his Hell Hole (as she and Harry decided to christen it) when new news of Bill arrived. It seemed that he was going to recover in time. The Healers had told her father, Mr. Weasley, that it might take anywhere from three weeks to a month for Bill to overcome his injuries. When Ginny had heard the news her first instinct had been to turn around and smile at Harry as if to secretly imply that she had been right all along. When she realized that he wasn't there for her to celebrate with, her heart froze like water in inclement temperatures. Due to interceptions, Dumbledore insisted that the only way to reach Harry at Privet Drive from Grimmauld Place was by Fawkes.

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It didn't seem fair to Ginny that Harry was secluded in a place that he hated. He had a right to know that Bill was going to be okay. She wanted to hold him and tell him that it wasn't his fault that Bill was injured. Every time Harry took the blame for something that he couldn't help, it broke her heart in two. He only did so that the rest of them would have someone to blame and so that they didn't feel as bad. This wasn't the first time Harry had tried to pull this; just the first time that she realized what was going on. She couldn't really be mad at him for it, though. When she saw how horrible HE felt about Bill, all she could think of was finding a way to extract all the pain and suffering out of him.

Having known him since she was eleven and having heard about him since she was ten, Ginny was still astounded at how much depth there was within Harry Potter and how much of it was unseen by the world. Every time she uncovered something new and mentioned it to Harry he would deny that he possessed anything as wonderful as to the aforementioned. That might be what made him so interesting to her. His modesty was something prized above all, if you call it that. The amount of Modesty that Harry held was very close to crossing the line between strong denial.

She was sure he would be kicking himself until he heard that Bill would be recovering. Even then, Harry would most likely never truly believe that none of it was his fault, despite the fact that he wasn't supposed to have even seen the vision to begin with. Thoughts of this were only frustrating Ginny more, as she longed to be with Harry. She hoped he wasn't missing her as dearly as she missed him.

Used to, Ginny would feel vulnerable if she told any of her secrets, but not anymore. During one of their talks late at night they discussed the Chamber of Secrets. It was then that she caught to his "blame game".

She had cried that night when she to Harry confided how weak she let Tom Riddle manipulate her through the diary that she stupidly wrote in. He had wrapped his arms tightly around her and told her that it would have happened to anyone in possession of the book; it's calling was very great no matter who the person was. He said it had nothing to do with weakness. That made Ginny think very hard about how she had ever gotten along without him this close to her.

Now she only felt the absence of him holding her, rather than the thick blanket covering her as she lay in bed. Ginny began to think that she may never get to sleep without Harry's quidditch callused hands stroking her cheek.

Feeling as restless as Harry usually was, Ginny got up and padded downstairs only to find nobody there. Ginny grabbed the thin blanket off of the back of the leather couch that she and Harry secretly fell asleep on together for the past week and a half. She curled up on the oddly spacious cushions, staring into the fire longing to see Harry again. She waited for him to shift his wait and smile at the giggle that she would emit. Nothing happed. With a sigh, Ginny imagined that over at his Hell Hole, Harry was turning over in his attempt to sleep, and she giggled at what she would say to him had be been at Headquarters instead.

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**Harry POV**

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Harry scrubbed his eyes tiredly as he reached for his glasses. He had finally exhausted himself to sleep with misery at his separation from Ginny and his guilt when a noise had awoken him. Once his glasses were in place he noticed that the noise had been Hedwig who had hooted to alert him of Fawkes arrival.

Knowing that the letter was news, Harry hastily ripped apart the seal on the parchment and read the message that Bill would eventually be fine. He stretched his arms out for Ginny to jump into only to have Fawkes nudge his hand and shake his head. He sighed in disappointment but then smiled as an idea struck him.

"Fawkes, would you deliver a note to Ginny Weasley for me?"

At the slight inclination of the crimson and gold bird's head, Harry reached for some parchment and a quill.

Thinking hard Harry decided to write a simply message that would explain to Ginny how he felt.

Ginny,

I've gone away. I don't feel you anymore. Can you feel it too? I miss you and can't wait to feel you again.

Truly Yours, Harry


End file.
